A clash of working styles can make collaborating with your boss or co-workers difficult (even frustrating!)  It can slow down teamwork, sour morale, and affect everyone’s ability to meet deadlines and perform on par with their potential.  

Often, teams have a hard time pinpointing what’s creating the problem. Luckily, there is a tool that helps identify and correct the causes of the issues.  

WORKING STYLES AND THE “CONATIVE” MIND  

Developed by Kathy Kolbe, the Kolbe System™ measures the “conative” part of the mind, which contains the instincts and innate attributes that define our natural methods of operation (MO). When we work in our natural style, we are more productive, more comfortable and more likely to achieve peak performance. 

As a Kolbe Certified™ Consultant for over 25 years, I know the Kolbe patterns like the back of my hand. I observe people’s actions through that lens. Yet, I still marvel at how much awareness this tool brings to people’s interactions – at work and in relationships. Here is a fun personal story that illustrates this! 

DIFFERENT PATTERNS OF ACTION 

This summer, my old friend, Helen and I decided to have a bucket list trip and travel to London to catch some matches at Wimbledon. Helen and I have almost opposite Kolbe scores but because we live far from each other and don’t spend much time together, we had never explored the practical impact of our pattern differences. 

Helen’s score would be described as strategic planning. Before taking action, she always gathers information and details to know the options (Fact Finder). She then defines her plan before moving forward (Follow Thru). Additionally, with a Quick Start score of 4, she needs to slow down the action and consider things before trying them. Her patterns were visible in her pre-trip preparation. She spent time researching and creating a plan for all the things we intended to do. She made dinner and play reservations weeks before our departure!   

Now, let’s look at my patterns. With a 9 in Quick Start and a lower Fact Finder score, I have a natural tendency to jump into action without gathering much information, and with a low Follow Thru score, some might describe me as impulsive. I create and change plans as I go. This energizes me. I often think about myself as a free spirit and can do whatever is in front of me. True to form, I did very little prep and research before we left, so I was thankful for Helen’s planning!  

THE IMPACT OF OPPOSITE PATTERNS 

Throughout the trip, the differences in our patterns were stark! Although we laughed about it, my sense is that we bugged each other. Knowing our Kolbe patterns was a huge help.  

For example, with her Follow Thru score Helen can find interruptions exhausting. I, on the other hand, get energized by them and constantly jump from topic to topic. Whenever Helen was looking at her phone to see where to eat or which way to go and I tried to speak to her, she ignored me and said she had to finish what she was doing. She could not entertain my idea or recommendation. The intensity of her focus was frustrating to me yet  I realized she wasn’t going to embrace my go-with-the-flow approach, so I ensured I stopped interrupting her.   

Although it wasn’t easy, I had to slow down my “play-it-by-ear” energy and let her be herself. That is the wisdom that Mel Ribbons suggests in her Let Them book.  

On one of the last days, we went our own ways. I took a bus tour to Windsor Castle, while Helen took the train up to Richmond to explore the charming town where they filmed Ted Lasso. We got together for dinner that night. The energy was fun and lighter between us after we had the opportunity to spend the day following our own patterns without having to deal with each other!  

As we struggled to find the restaurant, I let Helen study the map on her phone. I had stories to share with her and my instinct would have been to keep talking while we were searching for the spot. However, thanks to Kolbe’s insights, I knew she wouldn’t be able to listen until we found the place. Instead of getting frustrated, I honored her need to do one thing at a time. 

FROM CLASHING WORKING STYLES TO PEAK PERFORMANCE 

We tend to assume everyone takes action the way we do but that’s not the case. When a team presents clashing working styles, the first thing to do is bring awareness to everyone’s patterns and appreciate what each person’s innate style contributes to the team. Then, we look at how to structure the work flow to make the most of every person’s approach. Here’s a fun client interview about solving this type of collaboration problems. 

Are your team members getting on each other’s nerves because of conflicting working patterns? Could Kolbe help some of your relationships, even outside the workplace? Let’s talk!